My son is three years old. He is a sweet, precious, funny little kid. The apple of my eye. My cuddle bug. I miss him all day and can't get enough of him when I'm with him. My heart leaps simply with thoughts of him.
At the same time, he's an ornery, little bugger. He is in full swing of testing mommy and daddy until we're about to beat our head against the floor. Last night at dinner, Chad prayed that he and I would have patience with Matthew and give him the love he deserves. I believe that God blessed us with patience last night as we, once again, struggled through the bedtime routine.
Matthew has a chart for bedtime. On that chart is brushing teeth, going potty, changing into jammies, reading a story, turn off the light, mommy tells a story, then...the really tough one...he has to stay in bed - both at bedtime and through the night. That box is regularly left blank. Last night, however, he got every box checked off! He slept in the full-sized bed in the guest room, which will be his shortly - both the bed and the room. He slept better, and so did mommy. Hallelujiah!
So what was the key to our success last night? God's grace, with mommy and daddy. I had read an article yesterday on babycenter about disciplining a toddler. They are tough. Unfortunately, too often mommy and daddy lose their cool. Last night, I knew that what needed to happen was calm yet decisive cause and reaction. I left the discipline in Matthew's hands - based on his actions, there is a (natural) reaction. If he stacked the magazines he just flung across the room into a pile, then he could have a bedtime story. If he chose not to stack them in a pile then there would be no story. It was his choice. Of course, he didn't do so well with it the first time - he tried to ignore what we were saying by trying to put them back in the bag. This would have been harmless except we know him. It was a stalling technique. Since he didn't get his way, he hit daddy a few times, which meant he had to sit in time out. He tried getting up about five times. Rather than yelling at him or demanding that he listen, I calmly picked him back up and put him in his spot. After about four times I told him that every time he got up I would put him back. The same thing at bedtime, whenever he got out of bed I took him back. It's amazing that the answer is quite rational. Stay calm and just follow through. Too often our frustration leads to us getting upset and trying to find the quickest route, which is never a good solution. Calm follow through. That's the answer.
It is by God's grace that we were able to have a good night last night. Mommy and daddy don't deserve God's help, but He is gracious, good and loving. Also, for Matthew's sake, mommy and daddy need to be straightened out. Now God, please help us continue down this path.
What peace God's wisdom brings.
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