Overwhelming Joy

The joy of the Lord is so fulfilling that it overflows unlike anything else.  This morning I was singing the Christy Nockels version of Marvelous Light, and I could hardly sing through my joy.  When I tried to reign it in so I could sing, tears squeezed out from the corner of my eyes.  I can't imagine the joy being in God's presence.  It would surely stop a human heart.  Only the spirit that God sustains could survive it.

I've been thinking about my grandfather a lot lately.  Tuesday night while I was listening to The Old Rugged Cross in preparation for worship rehearsal on Wednesday night, my mom told me that it was grandpa's favorite.  He passed away in 1998, and I can't say I knew him really well.  I used to spend parts of summers in New Mexico, where they used to live.  He was always fun - laughing, joking around.  He was a joy.  Then he got sick, and he spent many years sick; down in the basement in his chair watching TV.  My mom was visiting them in New Mexico when he died.  She was actually the one who found him.  He was slumped over on his bed, either getting in or getting out.  I can't imagine what that must have been like for her.  Surreal, I suppose.
I never thought much about my grandpa's salvation.  I didn't know him well enough to know his faith.  I knew they always went to church - Church of Christ, like my other grandparents.  I've just never thought much about where he is.  I've wondered.  "Is he in misery now or incomparable joy?" 

This morning as I was rejoicing in my car on my way to work, I once again remembered my grandpa.  I felt something I can only describe as peace.  Not peace like, "Finally!  I got a minute to myself," or, "I finally feel resolved about this or that."  Peace.  And almost an understanding, a feeling of peace that said, "He's here."  I understand that what I think and feel doesn't change reality, but I also know that God is a personal and loving God who does speak to and move through His people.

As many times as I have thought about the way our nation's "celebrity" craze effects the way we look at Christian music and worship - and the way that has made me uncomfortable in my corporate worship when we're leading worship - I know that God has gifted me musically for the praise of His name and to bless me with the joy of enjoying that desire of my heart, talent, and gift of God.  How rude it would be to squelch it, since it is a gift from God - with a purpose for ministry.

"Sing joyfully to the Lord, you righteous; it is fitting for the upright to praise him.  Praise the Lord with the harp; make music to him on the ten-stringed lyre.  Sing to him a new song; play skillfully, and shout for joy.  For the word of the Lord is right and true; he is faithful in all he does.  The Lord loves righteousness and justice; the earth is full of his unfailing love."
Psalm 33 1-5